If you want to be
in the middle,
for the love of God,
please don’t hire us.


We bring tech firms to market, fast.

branding | content | enablement


Brand Repositioning, Refreshes & Copy Makeover

One of our clients took 672 meetings over 365 days just to end up looking and sounding like everyone else.

We vowed to never let that happen again.
CASE STUDY [PDF]


Content Marketing Engine

We build scary good content marketing engines for tech firms. You'll be 3 months ahead of schedule before you know it.

You have to see it to believe it.
How the content engine works (coming soon).

CIA

If the CIA needed to change someone's identity online, they would call us first.

We've mastered the ability to completely change how individuals and companies are perceived in the digital world.

If the CIA needed to change someone's identity online, they would call us first.

We've mastered the ability to completely change how individuals and companies are perceived in the digital world.

why

Our mission is to be left alone sooner rather than later.

Every project we take on helps us get closer to that goal.

Our mission is to be left alone sooner rather than later. Every project we take on helps us get closer to that goal.

beliefs

- words change lives

- do you, they’ll adjust

- consensus = average

- anything but the middle

- copy first, design second

- confidence is contagious

- It's only expensive if it doesn't work

- the best meetings are the canceled ones

banned

We will charge you $5 each time you make us use any of these words.

- Thought leader

- Transformation

- Human-centered design

- Human-centered design

- Design thinking

- Re-imagine (We REALLY hate this word)

- Re-think (Anything re- is off limits)

- Randi Zuckerberg (This one we charge $10 for. Long story.)

simple

Companies love complex, customers love simple. And the
last time we checked, the customers pay the bills.

Simple it is.

Companies love complex, customers love simple. And the last time we checked, the customers pay the bills.

Simple it is.

everyone

We aren't for everyone.

Our projects start at $150k.

It’s only expensive if it doesn’t work.

We aren't for everyone.

Our projects start at $150k.

It’s only expensive if it doesn’t work.

tone

We have a particular style of writing. It can be described as
simple, direct, unintentionally funny, with a hint of sarcasm
and a small, tiny splash of misery on top.

The misery is like adding cilantro to your taco dish.

You can do without it, but it’s a nice touch.

We have a particular style of writing. It can be described as simple, direct, unintentionally funny, with a hint of sarcasm and a small, tiny splash of misery on top. The misery is like
adding cilantro to your taco dish. You can do without it, but it’s a nice touch.

who

The mastermind behind this is Robbie Abed.

Robbie wrote the book conservatively titled “Fire Me I Beg You.”

He also published an unfinished manuscript called “Please Don’t Talk to Me.”

Notice a trend here?

The mastermind behind this is Robbie Abed.

Robbie wrote the book conservatively titled “Fire Me I Beg You.”

He also published an unfinished manuscript called “Please Don’t Talk to Me.”

Notice a trend here?


Will work for bitcoin.

But a normal ACH to our bank accounts works too.

$20 is $20.

Or in Bitcoin terminology: $20 is $18, I mean $27, I mean, holy shit, what did Elon Musk just tweet?

Will work for bitcoin.

But a normal ACH to our bank accounts works too.

$20 is $20.

Or in Bitcoin terminology: $20 is $18, I mean $27, I mean, holy shit, what did Elon Musk just tweet?

text us

If you want to get a hold of us, iMessage us at robbie.abed@gmail.com.

If you have an Android, we don't want to work with you.

If you want to get a hold of us, iMessage us at robbie.abed@gmail.com.

If you have an Android, we don't want to work with you.

thank you